Fashion is Passion

I just bit into a Reese's cup that both tasted like soap, and crunched a bit. I used my better judgment to face my losses and chuck the candy. We have an 80 year old courier who comes bearing a canvas bag of treats twice a week. Could these off-putting realities be more cliche? Sometimes I wonder if he will bring in apples with razors lodged inside, waiting to cut my pink gums. Some of the selections are seemingly harmless. Some of them look like they have been through two world wars; and I wouldn't doubt for a second they have been around that long.

He is an interesting gentleman. Though in no way is he gentle. He gets his kicks out of telling dirty jokes and staring just a little too long. This could be deemed sexual harassment in most work places, but the owner just shakes his head and laughs whenever he hears the end of an uncomfortable joke. I am often left to wonder if dirty old men arrive at their destination after years of suppressing such behavior, or did they act this way since they could speak in complete sentences? I am hoping for the latter, but leaning towards the former.

He ambles in looking in need of a nap. I fear for other drivers as I see him lurch into traffic at approximately 2 miles per hour. He is likely the kind of ancient driver that causes accidents. I learn to ignore the comments and looks because hey, I get free candy. 50% of the time it's completely edible too!