Backed out on the Cocks?

While crossing the street a large pick up truck drives by. I realized the secret to buying and keeping these mammoth vehicles (that probably cost over 100 bucks to fill with gas) is the fact that they are "Tax write-offs" for those with "Professional Lawn Care" businesses. Otherwise these brain-less hicks would be walking, or driving 20 year old Chrysler LeBarons.

The normal cat-calls generally come from grizzly men who lack both teeth and tact. "NICE LEGS" or shrill whistling is normal. I ignore it, because God knows acknowledging only encourages their primal and offensive behavior. I also don't take this as a compliment given the source, but also the average weight of women is roughly 300 pounds in this particular neighborhood.

Today I was wearing a fairly simple outfit. Shorts and a T-Shirt. The white travesty flies by and a woman yells to me this time. "NIIIICE OUTFIT!". Her tone was mocking, her face unfortunate. I was puzzled and amused. Was it the fact that I wasn't wearing Old Navy flip flops? Was it because I wasn't wearing sweat pant cutoffs and a stained white shirt? Did I really look that out of place? Then I remember, she lives in a mountain and drinks Schlitz like it's water.

The woman probably has 13 children, whom she strategically employed promptly as they turned five. I can imagine her cigarette damaged voice screaming at them. "Mow Faster! Mommy's gotta fill the tank today!"

Maybe this is an exaggeration. Somehow I doubt it. I really thought Warren County was the end of the line regarding country living. I am proven wrong once again. There are normal people here, but the ones who have never left NY state are much more fun and inappropriate to discuss. I want to drink with them, try to understand them. But I realize there's not much to understand. If I got on their good side though, they would learn that I am a person too! Not some anomaly.

Perhaps the two worlds should never mix. Besides, what could make for a better story to tell the family at dinner while roasting a pig. "I saw this gal today, she looked reallll weird...she musta thought she was in the city or somethin'. Overdressed and all that shit."